Call Me Mike, If You Like

THE MIKE MOVEMENT

Perhaps, It’s Just A Silly Summer Fad, Phenomena, Really …  Trending – #Mike – If You Haven’t Noticed …      

I suppose the Em momentum will fade in the Fall.  Maybe, not.

If the throngs of Mike Revisionists/Revolutionaries/Satirists don’t make this thing go viral.

… I Can Only Hope.

LATE SPOILER ALERT

In The Past Few Weeks, Precisely 3 (Or Possibly 4) Times Someone Has Called Me … Wait For It … Mike … 

Actually, three asked permission.  One didn’t:

“Mind If I Call You Mike?”  “Do You Prefer Mike or Michael?”  “Do You Like Being Called, Mike?”  “Hey, Mike.”

I answered,

“Yeah, No.”  “Neither, All The Time.”  “It’s My Name, Don’t Wear It Out.”  “Who Are You?”

BORN MICHAEL, RAISED MIKE

Because No One Asked … The Last Time My Name Got So Much Attention …   

I was in Court.  I practised saying my name … In the mirror During Happy Time, Right.

Either.  Aye-thur.  Ma-Hike. 

… Just.  Like.  It.  Sounds.

MIKE

If You Know Me …  

Simple.

Easy to memorize.

… Easier To Forget.

MICHAEL

If We’ve Never Met …   

Whenever I fill out forms.

By Traffic Cops.  Telemarketers.  CRA.

… Whenever I Meet Other Guys Named Mike.

MICK

To Some …  Mick Easy … 

Whenever I refer myself in The 3rd Person …  The Tao of Self-Deprecating

Which is a little creepy and just weird.  I need to stop this, Mick.

Carl, Mostly.

MICHELE NOT MICHELE 

mee-KEH-ley … like Ukulele … not mee-SHEL.

An Italian thing.  Pisan.  Capisce?

Like Mee-GAY.  One friends calls me this.  How he says it.

And, another, Mee-GAY-Lootz.  Obviously, I need new friends.

ALWAYS A BEFORE E

According To Every Web Source … 

Michael is the masculine proper noun originated in the ancient Hebrew question, מי כאל (mī kāʼēl:

“Who is like God?”

… So, I’ve Got That Going For Me.

MISCHA

MEE-sha … MEE-sha … MEE-sha … 

Having My Jan Brady Flashback Moment.

And, also, from my Mikhail Days as a Bohemian Artster in the Way, Way Back.

… Never Mind.  Ancient.  History.  Oversharing Is Caring.

MARK

Once … 

By her.

Oops …

… There You Go.

KUCH

KOO-ch.

Whoever’s Sad Idea Of A Mean Practical Joke It Was To Create This Name? 

Nice one, really.  Very funny.  Fine.  Small mercy for being unknown.

… So Thankful Fame Eluded Me.

POST SCRIPT

Mikey Works, Too.

Every time.

Like those colorful M&M’s

… Anyone Will Do.

 

Photo by Caio Resende

 

 

 

 

 

 

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