Che Cazzo?

“DUBYA TEE EFF”

Is Going On … Question?  Statement! 

Exasperated.  Emphatic.  Emotion.

Cussin’ is a Lazy-Tongued Habit – Leaving The Mouth – When Something More Dignified Can Be Said.

Swearing in any language.  Necessary on Occasion.  When I’m Feeling Continental.

 

FUN FACT CONFESSION #1

I’m Trying To Quit Cursing – Just Not All At Once – Where’s The Fun In That?

Scratch that.  I’d like to Cut Down On Swearing.  Is there a Transdermal Patch to wean me off?  And, do most medical insurance plans cover it?

I’m a realist.  My intention admirable.  About time.  A Self Intervention wouldn’t hurt.

My devotion to – and execution of – this noble gesture could use a splash of mindful insurgence and deeper commitment.

 

FUN FACT CONFESSION #2

Cursing Will Never Be Fully Obliterated In My Vocabulary …     

Awareness Matters.  Sure.  Better choices I can always make.

Personality Spoiler Alert:  Swearing perfectly suits my polarizing demeanor.  My dumb rationale.  I possess neither a Baby Face nor Pious disposition.

More on the Surprising Approachability & Likeability of My Resting Pr!ck Face in an upcoming post.

 

HISTORY LESSON

Swearing Pre-Dates Grammar In English By One Historical Sentence … 

No, I don’t have proof.

Though, I suspect with an errant smudge of his masterful quill, William Shakespeare must’ve muttered these words during his first draft of Macbeth:

“This Sh!t Doesn’t Make Sense, Or Even Rhyme … Hey, I Think I’ll Invent A F@cking Semicolon … Boom!”

 

AN OLD FAMILY TRADITION

My Late Mother Had An Appallingly Filthy Mouth … 

For a Mom.  In her day.  Worse than any Sailor.

Let that resonate for a moment – Bad Mommy Words – And, not just the regular swear words.  Nasty, biting.  With no room for misinterpretation.

I may have inherited the Obscene Gene responsible for spewing profanity.

 

JOHN JACK JOHN

One Guy … Big Brother Number Two … Three Names … 

Evidently, Triple J actually Taught-Me-To-Swear in the Way, Way Back.  What I’m told.  A Little How I Remember Learning My First Cuss Words.

Of course, this was many years before John found Jesus.  When he was still Jack.  And, didn’t Speak in Tongues.  All true.  The Dichotomy of John.

I’ll formally introduce No. 2 bit later …

 

POOR VOCABULARY ISN’T MY PROBLEM

Without Exception … 

Writers typically speak well.

Eloquent.  Loquacious.  Wordy.

Especially, when we want to be insufferable.

 

“PROFANITY DOES NOT MAKE THE MAN, SIR”

This Lofty Adage Was Drilled Into My Thick Adolescent Skull At Fifteen … 

It had almost no affect on me in High School – I Didn’t Listen Much – through College and into the Business World.

People swear.  A lot.  In everyday Life.

Perhaps, not so much in front of the Pope, the Queen or our parents, but we swear in front of God like he wasn’t even there …

 

DIRTY DIATRIBES DONE DIRT CHEAP

My Not-Always-Adorable Rants Is When The Eff Bombs Detonate … 

I’ve calmed considerably in recent years.  Its gotten old and tiresome.  And, well, I just don’t like it – or me – when WTF’s drop.

Then my appreciation for British Humour heightened …

Oh, My … that all went to crap listening to those articulate English Effers, as I picked up some new, fancy derisions not suitable for publication.

 

REVERENCE FOR EXPLETIVES

It Is Sociably Acceptable To Cuss?

No, it’s not.  But, yes, it happens.

Rich.  Famous.  Poor.  Infamous.

… Ever Been In A Corporate Boardroom With Blowhard Executives P!ssing On Everyone?

 

THE MOST ARTICULATE PERSON I KNOW

Has A Potty Mouth … 

By choice.

A former English Professor.  Diplomat.  Doctoral Degree.

He’s been a role model of mine since I was a teen.

 

MY PREFERENCES

Bastardo Is My Go To Cuss …

Nearly Endearing.  The O helps to soften the hit.  Italiano.

Never.  Ever.  Never …  Em Ef  … Never.  Ever.  Never. 

Inarguably, the most Uncouth.

 

THE HYPOCRITE IN ME SAYS

“I Deplore Swearing.”

Dislike to hear it, but yeah, I do it.

Intolerable of Self when I stoop there.

Bad.  Bad.  Habit.

 

CUSSING @ HOME

I Swear – I Swear – Only In Good Company … Never With Strangers … 

Rarely in front of my dog.  Ear muffs, Raffi.  Impossibly Cute Shih Tzu’s are not impressed by poor social manners.

Or, Small Children.  Though I make exceptions for Babies.

Newborn’s don’t seem to understand – or, let on that they do; they’re conniving that way – and if I get a giggle, I’ll slip one in while I’m tickling their chubby toes.

 

Photo by Public Domain Photography from Pexels

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