Red Cups In My Office

I’M 2 SHORT OF A FULL SET OF 6

Perhaps, You’ve Noticed The Four Of Them Behind My Desk … 

Sitting Pretty.  Stacked.  Innocuous Litter Buggers Left Over From The Last Inter-Department Potluck Peace Treaty.

“There’s A Bunch More Wrapped In A Clear Plastic Sleeve In The Staff Kitchenette.  Upper Cabinet, Second Shelf, To The Left.  Next To The Crushed Box Of Instant Oats, Expired Sweeteners, And Brown Swizzle Sticks That Aren’t Going Anywhere Near My Tongue Or Lips.”

Also, Those Ugly Coffee Mugs That No One Uses Because No One Knows Where They Came From:  Can We Just Toss Them Already?  I Have A Theory Of Their Dubious Provenance, Which Is Unkind And Probably True.  Remember Doug In Accounting?

 

ALSO, I’M TRADING IN

The Keurig For A Keg … 

Dumping Caffeine For Chugging Beer.  Just Like We Use To Do.  When We Cared.  What?

No, Etch Argh Doesn’t Have To Know About This.  Or, The Ping Pong Balls I’ve Expensed.

… Don’t Worry, I Have A Plan.

 

LET’S CALL IT “TEAM BUILDING”

If Anyone Asks … We’re Starting A Libation Committee … 

To Improve Employee Morale.  By Getting Elevated.  On The Job.  Like in Mad Men.

Because Last Summer’s “Yoga-At-Lunch / Meditation-On-The-Lawn” Midday Shindig Did Jack Squat But Return Tired, Sweaty Buddha-fied (Gluten Deflecting) Bodies Into The Building.

… Then We Had The Hygiene Issue With Some Of The More Enthused Participants – Little Too Much Glow Fo Sho – Which I Had To Address After Hearing All About It From The Horde Of Haters, And How Pleasant Was That For Me?  Well, It Wasn’t.

 

WORK FAM JAM FEELS LIKE SPAM

The Squad’s Been Down In The Dumps … Over Worked … Under Loved.  

“Sad Faces In Work Spaces Don’t Make For Happy Places.”

Good Folks Beaten Up.  Eats Me.  I Don’t Like It.

… When Quality People Have Exodus On Their Minds.

 

Image By Burst @ Pexels

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